An Unfinished Marriage was an obvious sequel to A Year by the Sea. Everyone seemed to want to know what happened to the marriage and what became of my husband. To be honest, I wanted to figure that out as well. Would our separation help re-ignite the marriage or diminish it? Much like my year alone, the marriage sputtered and reshaped itself. I continued to work hard to maintain my autonomy while he experienced his own “year by the sea” by venturing out, much as I had, to figure out what had been missing in his life and what he was meant to do next. We both took the opportunity to look beyond the traditional roles we had always played in order to get used to being the new people we were becoming.
Some of my readers had trouble, at first, with the shift from I to WE. But I am a firm believer that relationships keep us conscious—that there is much wisdom to be gained from working with, not against, one’s partner. You can learn much more about yourself when you look into a spouse’s eyes than staring at your own reflection in a mirror. I have come to see that to love is to seek to release the other.
Some of the best lines in this book are my husband’s. When it was our 32nd anniversary and I sarcastically said, “Thirty-two years with the same person! That is absurd!” He gently responded: “But that’s just it, we’re not the same person.”
Praise for An Unfinished Marriage
“Readers of An Unfinished Marriage will find thoughtful reflection and candor in this close-up of a marriage at mid-life. In this sequel she continues into the following year when she and her newly retired husband move into their cottage together. The two face the process of building a new partnership as Anderson re-adjusts to living with another person and her husband comes to terms with his non-working status.” —Publishers Weekly
“Following up on her discoveries during A Year by the Sea, this best-selling author explains how she repaired her marriage. This book shares much about long term marriage, changing relationships, and how one couple adjusts to each other’s growing.” —Library Journal
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